365 Days of Il Dolce Far Niente

I've spent most of this past year underneath a dark cloud of depression. What started as an overwhelming feeling of sadness quickly took over my entire life. I struggled even getting out of bed most days. Everything that had ever brought me joy was put on a very long pause. Daily walks around my neighborhood. Cooking. Food in general. I completely lost my appetite. Couldn't even find enjoyment from my favorite songs and tv shows. I was just numb and paralyzed with apathy.

I only recently realized that part of it might have been not having something to really work for during that time. I had finally graduated. I received my bachelor's degree. After all those years, school was over! What was originally relief from never having to take another math class or write any more essays turned into something more like grief, I think.

When I decided to apply to school again this year, I had to really push myself during the application process. It should have felt overwhelming, but instead it brought me back to life. I realized two things in that moment:

1) I needed a challenge to actually enjoy life
2) It's really fucked that I need a challenge to enjoy life

I have tried several times over the years to complete 75 Hard. I've been successful in completing it zero times, but I still enjoyed the journey. While I would at some point love to actually make it through the full 75 days, I decided I needed a different kind of challenge to heal me right now. So I created 365 Days of Il Dolce Far Niente as a sort of anti-hustle culture challenge.

Il dolce far niente is an Italian phrase that literally translates to “the sweetness of doing nothing.” But the idea behind it isn't about laziness. It's about allowing yourself to enjoy a moment without rushing through it or feeling like you should be doing something more productive. Sitting in the sun with a coffee. Taking a walk with nowhere in particular to be. Lingering at the table after a meal. Getting lost in a good book. These are the small moments that make up a life. Dolce far niente isn't really about doing nothing. It's about being fully present in your own life.

I struggle a little with calling this a challenge. The whole idea of dolce far niente feels at odds with turning the simple enjoyment of life into another thing to accomplish. But hustle culture has already made resting without guilt feel wrong, so maybe turning the sweetness of doing nothing into its own challenge is actually a genius way to trick us all into slowing down.

So, here are the rules I've come up with loosely based on 75 Hard. I'll be starting on my birthday! Instead of 75 days I decided to make this a year-long challenge since it's really more about a life well lived than it is about pushing you to your limit. And I refuse to waste another whole year of my life sitting under that dark cloud.

Feel free to start with me. I hope this teaches you it's ok to just do things for the joy of it all.

The Rules

1) No screen time 1 hour after waking up and 1 hour before bed. This is probably going to be the most difficult rule of the whole challenge, but also the most important. When you wake up and reach for your phone first thing, your mind fills with everyone else’s world before you have even stepped into your own. News, opinions, other people’s highlight reels, things to compare yourself to, things to worry about. Your day has barely started and your nervous system is already buzzing. At night, it follows you into bed. Instead of letting the day settle, you fall asleep carrying the noise of everything you just consumed.

For this rule, keep your phone set aside for one hour after waking and one hour before bed. In the morning, wake up slowly. Make coffee. Step outside. Let yourself exist before you perform. At night, read your book. Drink your tea. Let your mind rest as the day closes.

2) Exercise for 45 minutes. Keeping this rule from 75 Hard. One of the best ways to take care of yourself is to keep your body strong, mobile, and active. I am so sorry to be the one to tell you, but it's true: when we move regularly, we feel better, think more clearly, and have more energy to enjoy the things that make life good. Each day, spend 45 minutes moving your body. This does not have to be an intense exercise. It could be a walk, yoga, strength training, cycling, dancing, stretching, or any activity you enjoy that helps to keep you in shape. The goal is simply to stay active so your body can support the life you want to live, one filled with walks, adventures, good food, and everyday moments of joy.

Never beating the millennial pose allegations ✌

3) Spend 30 minutes outside, rain or shine. The 45-minute outdoor workout from 75 Hard was the inspiration to this rule. But instead of another workout, you just need to get outside. Touch grass! Being outside connects you to the rhythm of the world around you. Sun on your face, wind in your hair, the quiet of a foggy morning, or the feeling of heavy rainfall, these moments can reset your mind, lift your mood, and remind you that life exists beyond screens and to-do lists. Take a walk, sit outside with a coffee, read in the sun, stroll through a park, or simply step outside and breathe for a while. Experience the elements as they are.

Of course, use common sense. In cases of extreme weather, dangerous storms, or unsafe heat or cold, adjust accordingly. The goal is to reconnect with the outdoors, not to put yourself at risk. Rain or shine, spend at least 30 minutes outside every day.

4) Drink 1 gallon of water. I decided to keep this rule as 1 gallon just like 75 Hard because I think it's one of the main things that gave me the most benefit while I followed the program. I have been pretty dehydrated lately, and I can definitely feel the difference in my body. I'd much rather be peeing every 20 minutes than feeling as terrible as I've felt without hitting my water goal. Feel free to adjust this one as it suits you. You might not need an entire gallon. Maybe half your body weight in ounces is enough for your body. Just be sure that you are hitting the same target goal daily, and not a drop less.

5) Make 1 real meal. Not as intimidating as it sounds. While this rule is the perfect excuse to try any of the elaborate recipes you have pinned, you definitely don't need to be cooking a 5-course meal every single day. Something as simple as a pb&j counts. This is just a moment for you to slow down, be a little more mindful about the food you are putting into your body, and savor every bite. Take a little more time here. Eat slowly. Put your phone away. Unlike the diet rule with 75 Hard, this just focuses on one meal a day (bonus points if you can do this for every meal, but we're not about burnout around here).

6) Read 10 pages of any book. For some reason, one of the things I struggled with after trying to complete 75 Hard was reading for pleasure. I love to read, but if it wasn't a non-fiction personal development book, I felt guilty making time for it. I know that probably doesn't make much sense, and likely wasn't an issue for most people. But in case it's something you've struggled with, here is your permission: you are allowed to read whatever you want to read without guilt! Please read just for the joy of reading. Hate reading? Try an audiobook. It's ok, I promise. I just want you to take the time to fall in love with a story. Any story.  

7) Document the day. This rule is meant to be a way that both expresses creativity and keeps an intentional record of your day. I'm a photographer, so when I originally created this challenge, I wrote it as "take 1 photo a day."  But there are so many ways to be creative and intentional. I thought it would be best to expand the definition. You can write a journal entry or a short story, paint a picture, record a voice note, make a collage, take a picture. However you want to express yourself, do it in this moment. It can be personal. You don't have to share it with the world. We aren't documenting to perform here. Create it for yourself.

8) Spend 5 minutes decluttering 1 area of your life. Set a timer and go. Delete emails from your inbox. Sort through the mail. Put away the laundry. This isn't meant to be a deep clean. Just a few minutes spent on a simple task you've been putting off so you can finally release it from your mind.

This challenge will be incredibly difficult, but it isn't meant to make you feel defeated. You don't have to start over from day 1 if you miss an item on the list (unless you want to). You can even just use my ideas as guidelines and make your own list to build your personal dolce far niente life.

I'm so excited to use the next 365 days to heal and grow and live my best life! Maybe eventually I'll be able to just enjoy the sweetness of doing nothing without having to turn it into a challenge.

Comment below or tag me in your posts/stories if you'll be joining me!